New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize