what if every blade of grass was a penis?
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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