You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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