he was CRYING into my vagina
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
