my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
The uberlube is also flammable
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
