i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Randomize
