My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
