my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
Everclear isn't food dammit
Randomize
