Already got asked if we're dating
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
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