oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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