just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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