I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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