Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Randomize
