just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
