On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
