Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Randomize