It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
