if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
and she was petting her beer can
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
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