i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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