Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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