Whod you bang
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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