He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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