he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
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