Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
