Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
