If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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