i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize