Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
