Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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