My brain says no but my pants say off.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
He better not be in your backpack
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
