btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
