some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
