A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Randomize
