oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Found the puke drawer
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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