i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Randomize