can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize