I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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