he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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