omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
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