At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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