I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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