the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
