its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
There's even glitter on my cock...
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