Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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