I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I want a musical about memes.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
