Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
