Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
