Cold hands, warm shart.
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
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