Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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