so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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