Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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