Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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